What’s your #1 priority tomorrow?

die. Or that’s what I’m being told. How would you feel if your medical professionals acted in such a spiteful manner?

When it becomes a luxury to go home. Home should not feel like a tomb. It sure beats staying in a hospital bed while everyone in your medical team chastises you for not doing as they say.

They must’ve forgotten the fact that I have severe medical PTSD. I’m literally scared to death to be in this place right now.

Being in here is like a double-edged sword, it cuts both ways. I’m healing my body, but breaking my mind.

Will there ever be balance?

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"Returning to the Hospital"



There's nothing quite as haunting,
As that antiseptic scent, daunting,
Upon the walls, the sanitizing brew,
In a place where fear eternally grew.

It penetrates deep, straight to the core,
Where past traumas haunt once more,
Unwinding sanity's fragile cord,
As anxieties, like a sword, are scored.

Within these sterile walls, I'm confined,
To a realm where the brave resign,
A place where life and death converge,
In this medical labyrinth I must submerge.

The whiteboard stands, a silent witness,
To the countless battles, pain, and sickness,
In this place where healing's intertwined,
With memories of struggles, of every kind.

For I, with medical PTSD's grip,
Each step's a journey, a painful trip,
But remember, in the darkest hour,
My strength shines forth like a radiant flower.

Through the pain and the memories past,
I am a warrior, enduring steadfast,
In this hospital, where fear may roam,
I return, but I am not alone.

©️ Arwen-Wynter Oakley 2023